MESSAGE #1293 ARE YOU HELPING OR ARE YOU HURTING?
The other day I was coaching on a court next to another pro. This pro used to be a top junior and collegiate player, so he obviously can play the game. But just because someone can play doesn’t mean they can coach, does it?
In education, there are many intelligent individuals, but does that mean they are great teachers? The answer is no.
From my court, I heard a mis-hit, a ball off the frame of the racquet, by one of this coach’s students. There’s nothing wrong with that. But then I heard the coach yell, “Great shot!”
I looked over to see who he was talking to, and sure enough, he was talking to the boy who made the error.
It’s important to be positive, but it has to be real. You can’t just say “Great shot!” for the sake of saying it. That doesn’t help the student. As coaches, perhaps we can change that and say, “Great swing, but make sure you watch the ball longer next time,” to maximize our students’ improvement.
I have a business partner who tells me how it is, regarding our projects, whether I want to hear it or not. Most people don’t like hearing the truth, especially if it hurts. But guess what? I love hearing the truth. I would rather hear it and learn from it than have someone just telling me what I want to hear in order to make me feel good.
And parents, focus less on telling your children how beautiful they are and start telling them how proud you are of their effort and constant improvement.
That’s how winners are made.
But that’s just my opinion.
Leave your comments below.
MESSAGE #1257 HOW TO KEEP YOUR NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS
Nothing changes on New Year’s Day.
-BONO, rock star
Does anything really change on New Year’s Day?
I suppose change is possible, but is it lasting change?
Doing something once is not impressive.
Doing something consistently is impressive.
Don’t make resolutions, set goals and make lifestyle changes.
I’ve working out in gyms for most of my life and it amazes me how so many people start the new year off with amazing INTENTIONS by joining a gym and deciding to work out like they never worked out before, but don’t stick with it.
Their good intentions usually last only a few weeks.
By the end of January, those “motivated” people fall by the wayside.
Why does this phenomenon occur?
Because most people don’t know how to set goals.
Here’s what most people are doing wrong:
1. They don’t set specific goals; they said “I want to get in shape” versus “I am going to lose 10 pounds by March 1, 2011 at 8am.”
2. They let their goals too low. Michelangelo said, “It’s not that we set our sights too high and we don’t reach them; it’s that we set our sights too low and we DO reach them.” Set your sights high!
3. They think they can do it on their own. Get a trainer. Get coach. Get an accountability partner. Tell everyone about your goals. THEN you will be more likely to stick with it.
4. They don’t make their goals important enough. If something is important enough, you will stick with it.
5. They try their best, instead of DOING WHATEVER IT TAKES. There will be days you don’t “feel like” sticking to your goals. But those are the days you HAVE TO. Winners and losers feel the same feelings, but winners take the right action.
What are YOUR New Year’s Goals?
Leave your comments below.
Want a jump-start to a new you? Email ed@edtseng.com to schedule a free 10-minute mental toughness consultation, or to request information on one-on-one mental toughness coaching via telephone/skype.
MESSAGE #1227 WHY THIS IS “THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR”
Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.
-BUDDHA
For many, this is the most wonderful time of the year. I concur.
Even though I feel like this all year ’round, I particularly enjoy the holidays for one main reason.
People GIVE.
Don’t get me wrong, people giving is not so I can get “stuff.”
People giving is actually people GETTING.
Let me explain…
When you give to someone, you GET much more in return. It feels better when you GIVE than when you receive. That’s a big reason why I blog every day and donate my time, services and products throughout the year. It makes ME happy.
When you give, you feel good.
The best way to make yourself happy is to make someone else happy.
The best way to get motivated is to get someone else motivated.
The best way to become successful is to make someone else successful.
That’s why I think this is the most wonderful time of the year.
Can you apply this to teamwork? School? Your job?
You bet.
As a matter of fact, research has shown that people who volunteer and give more of themselves, reap the health benefits (mental and physical) for up to 50 years.
It’s about OTHERS.
So as you go through this holiday season, focus less on what you might get and focus more on what you intend to GIVE. And remember, it doesn’t necessarily have to be an object, it can be your time, a compliment or just doing a little bit extra.
MESSAGE #1218 IMPROVEMENT
Players get better after their coach gets better.
Students get better after their teacher gets better.
Employees get better after their manager gets better.
Many coaches, teachers and managers wonder why their players, students and employees are not getting optimal results.
But it’s not about the players, students or employees.
It’s about the coaches, teachers and managers.
So what can you do?
1. Lead by example. Others will follow.
2. Show your passion. It will be contagious.
3. Respect EVERYONE. We are all equal.
4. Strive for constant improvement. We can always improve our craft.
5. Develop a TEAM-first mentality. The great ones know individual goals come second.
MESSAGE #1216 ACTION
Today’s message is especially dedicated to all the great basketball/tennis players, coaches and parents that attended my “Mental Edge” seminar.
In my seminar today, in conjunction with the great Micah Lancaster’s basketball session, I talked about how to get the mental edge in sports and life. I shared some of the mental secrets of the world’s greatest athletes.
One of the keys I stressed was that knowing the mental secrets was not good enough–you need to APPLY them.
Information is nothing without implementation.
Everyone knows what they need to do, but most people don’t do it.
And here’s the secret…
A real champion does what they need to do, when they need to do it, whether they feel like it or not.
You don’t have to feel like a champion to act like a champion. It’s a choice, and it can begin right now.
A special thanks to Brian Klatsky for making “The Mental Edge” possible today.
MESSAGE #1215 BE HONEST
I once worked at a sports center and on one occasion, there was a tournament which took up many courts, so a small number of clinics were rescheduled. Well, the front desk manager neglected to tell me that one of my classes was not going to run that day, obviously an oversight. But when I mentioned it to him, his response was, “Hmm, maybe you need to spend more time here.”
More time there? I was there six days a week!
I didn’t mind the oversight, but I was shocked that he would blame me for not “spending more time” there. A simple admission and apology would have sufficed.
But some people don’t like to be wrong.
Some people don’t like to admit they made a mistake.
I will tell you this, I lost a lot of respect for that manager.
Am I perfect?
Not even close, but I admit when I’m wrong. I learn from my mistakes.
I have people complain about things that I do.
Do I feel bad?
Of course, but they I make a note of it and improve upon it.
Mistakes are acceptable.
Excuses are not.
Recent Comments