Message #161 Do You Wanna Be an Actor?

Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Eileen DeNobile, personal talent agent.

Eileen DeNobile has been in “the business” for 26 years working with various actors/actresses and performers. She represents movie stars, people who do commercials, voice overs, everything. I asked Eileen what it took to be successful in acting.

Determination-you need to have the drive to succeed and be the best at what you do.

Efficacy (belief in self)-you have to believe in yourself and “own the room” when you walk into an audition.

Persistence-this is the key since failure is part of the game; as long as you keep going and learn, you will stand out from the crowd.

Are these principles specific to acting? Of course not. You need determination, efficacy and persistence in whatever you do.

For those of you out there that are aspiring to become actors/actresses, use these principles above.

For those of you out there who are aspiring to become great at whatever you do, use these principles above.

Thanks for reading.

Message #160 For Love of the Game (and Life)

Today’s message is dedicated to the great Gayle Scroggs, PhD, International Coach and Translator, in Buenos Aires, Argentina.

LOVE is another one of Seligman/Peterson’s Signature Strengths.

LOVE means zero or “nothing” in tennis scoring. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

Love is EVERYTHING in tennis, sports and life.

If you don’t love what you do, find something else to do.

Here’s what I LOVE about tennis:

-It’s a good workout while having fun
-It helps me break a “mental” sweat, as well as a physical one
-It teaches me skills that I can use in other areas of life
-It enables me to help others develop skills, have fun, get exercise
-It has helped me meet some amazing people I otherwise would probably not have met
-I love the “POP” of the ball hitting the sweet spot
-I love the smell of a new can of tennis balls
-I love my opponents for helping me improve
-I love learning about the game and it’s history
-I love using tennis as a metaphor for life

LOVE is one of the most powerful things in the world.

When you take the time to think about and appreciate all the things that you love, you will…

Be happier
Have less stress
Have better relationships
Get better results
Slow down life
Become fulfilled

So the next time someone tells you LOVE means nothing to a tennis player…tell them they’re wrong.

Thanks for reading.

Message #159 ENERGY!!!

As a tennis pro and mind/body/spirit trainer, I see much of society doing it wrong. I have been working out/training basically my whole life. I see people going to the gym or tennis courts 6 days a week, pushing themselves to the limit, and then they can’t even bend over to tie their own shoes! Or they need to go home and take a nap! They over-work themselves. Then, there are others who don’t exercise at all, or at best, inconsistently. And THEY need a nap or can’t tie their own shoes.

So what it boils down to is ENERGY. What we ultimately want is more energy. Think of it this way…

Who cares how much skill or knowledge you have if you are too tired to be productive?

Who cares how much love there is inside of you if you don’t have the energy to spend time with loved ones?

Who cares how much raw talent you have if you can’t get energized on the court?

One way to instantly increase your energy is to look at what you’re putting into your body. Most of us are constantly on the go, so we consume a large quantity of processed food. Processed foods are acidic and this causes illnesses. What we need to do is alkalize our bodies and gain the balance. When we are alkalized, we can prevent such things as cancer, arthritis, heart disease and colds/flus. One way to do this is eating natural foods, like fruit and vegetables. The problem there is that you need to eat a LOT of fruit and vegetables to alkalize your body. Here’s an easier way…

Start adding GREEN DRINKS to your diet. It’s probably the best and quickest way to alkalize your body. The green drink that I am currently using is a combination of a grass blend (wheat grass, barley grass, alfalfa, spirulina, spinach, broccoli), antioxidants (acai, maca, carrot, beet, raspberry, rose hips, pineapple, green tea, acerola cherry), fiber (flax seed powder, apple pectin fiber), digestive enzyme and active culture (FOS ‘from chicory root’, L Acidophilus, alpha and beta amylase, protease, lipase, lactase, cellulase), and an energizing herb blend (Siberian eleuthero root, peppermint).

Now, you may be asking yourself, “Isn’t it better to just EAT a lot of vegetables?” The answer is yes and no. Sure, you could eat the equivilent in vegetables, but it would take exponentially more vegetables versus just adding 3 drinks a day, in addition to other vegetables.

In the past I have talked about fresh fruit and juices. The effect of the fruit is not as lasting and you also have to be careful about all the sugar in fruit. I think the green drinks are a better alternative.

Aside from giving you the energy you want, green drinks naturally detoxify and boost your immune system. You will have lasting energy throughout the day. This by no means replaces normal meals or working out, but it is a great supplement. I highly recommend it. You can find it at most health food stores, just be careful of fillers. I get mine at Whole Foods.

Start taking care of your body…you only have ONE.

Thanks for reading.

Message #158 Questioning a Detective

Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Chris Longo, Detective in Lawrence, NJ and winner of the Meritorious Service Award.

The more I talk with people in different walks of life and industries, the more amazed I am that we are all the same.

The success principles are the same regardless of what you do.

It is usually a detective doing the questioning, but yesterday, when I met with Detective Chris Longo, I was asking the questions.

One of the challenges a detective faces is staying organized and meeting deadlines. There is much paperwork to do and many reports to be written. Like Detective Longo, we all have our assignments and need to get them accomplished in a timely fashion. This helps everything run smoothly for everyone.

A detective also needs to build a rapport with many different people in many different situations. One minute you could be giving a death notification to a mother and then before you know it, you might have to deal with a gang member. Detective Longo said that it is important to be able to establish trust and respect in order to gain insight to a specific case.

Obviously, a detective needs to be physically fit, but they also need to be mentally fit, says Longo. If you do not have the right mindset, you will not succeed. You cannot let your emotions get in the way; you need to take action regardless of your feelings. We all need to be able to do that.

Of course success comes when an case or assignment is solved, but there’s more to it. You need to be persistent and patient because some cases take time. Staying in the present is key, therefore, you need to be focusing on the process instead of the product.

As with any occupation, you need to develop specific skills and maintain, some examples are:

Firearms
Unarmed Defense
PR 24 (Police Baton)
Domestic Violence
CPR

Although detectives have customized programs and skills they need to develop, they still face the same challenges as you and me.

We all need to:
-Be physically AND mentally fit
-Establish good relationships
-Stay on top of assignments
-Take action regardless of feelings
-Be persistent and patient
-Stay in the present
-Focus on the process vs the product

Thank you, Detective Longo.

Thanks for reading.

Message #157 How To INSTANTLY Become Better at What You Do

Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Eileen DeNobile.

Do you want to become better at whatever you do? Of course you do, but how long will it take for you to become the best in your field? It will take some time because skills take a while to develop.

I’m going to tell you how you can INSTANTLY become better at what you do…

Vitality

Vitality is LIFE

Vitality is ENERGY

All you have to do is INCREASE your energy at whatever you are doing.

All you have to do is put more LIFE into what you are doing.

Most people at work and school and on the ball field have life and energy when they feel like it. That’s when they perform at their best. They LOOK like they are one of the best. They BECOME one of the best.

The problem is…what do they do when they don’t FEEL full of energy? How do they act when they don’t FEEL full of life?

Most people act according to how they are feeling.

There is only one difference between the champion and the loser on the field…

There is only one difference between the best employee at work and the worst…

There is only one difference between the best chef in town and the worst…

There is only one difference between the top student in class and the worst…

The great ones have more ENERGY and LIFE in them. They have vitality; and they have it when they feel like it LEAST.

So as you try to make ’08 GREAT, try to add some energy and life to what you are doing…you’ll be amazed at the results.

Thanks for reading.

Message #156 Be the Change You Want to See in the World

I met Alex Salzman last month at the Book Bank Foundation’s “Shelter From the Streets” event in NYC. Mr. Salzman began something amazing in 2007, with two other co-founders that you will be hearing a lot about in the near future. Rethos.com is an online community where individuals, non-profit organizations, and socially responsible businesses unite on solutions to social and environmental issues. People are already calling it “MySpace.com with a conscience.”

From the Rethos.com site…

Today, over 27,000 children died around the world

by Anup Shah

Around the world, 27–30,000 children die every day.
That is equivalent to:

1 child dying every 3 seconds
20 children dying every minute
A 2004 Asian Tsunami occurring almost every week
An Iraq-scale death toll every 15–35 days
10–11 million children dying every year
Over 50 million children dying between 2000 and 2005
The silent killers are poverty, hunger, easily preventable diseases and illnesses, and other related causes. In spite of the scale of this daily/ongoing catastrophe, it rarely manages to achieve, much less sustain, prime-time, headline coverage.

Source: The Cause of Poverty

Making a lot of money won’t leave you fulfilled. Winning the US Open won’t leave you fulfilled. Doing your part and leaving the world better than you found it WILL. Please watch the video below.

Thanks for reading.

rethos.com

Message #155 Perspective

Ok, now that we’re back at work, school, the gym, the field, the courts, etc…

We need to step it up this year. We need to make ’08, GREAT. Even if you had a good year in ’07, you still need to push yourself. In fact, push yourself even MORE. Most people, after a good year, tend to relax and guess what? We get lazy, rest on our laurels and our competitors creep up on us and sometimes surpass us. So keep it going or get it going. What we’re talking about here is committing to constant improvement. Not with others, but with OURSELVES.

So let’s talk about perspective. Perspective is one of Martin Seligman’s (Father of Positive Psychology) 24 character strengths.

One thing that we need to be aware of in sports and life is that in every situation there are different perspectives.

Ellen Langer (Mindfulness) at Harvard talks in depth about perspectives, as well.

Below are two situations and two different perspectives for each…

Situation #1:

You just lost a tennis match against the top player in the state.

Perspective #1:

This stinks; I stink. I hate losing…why can’t I just win a match? What are my parents going to say? What are my friends going to say? What is my coach going to say? Maybe I should try golf.

Perspective #2:

Wow, I just played the top tennis player in the state; what an experience. Even though I lost, I learned so much and actually had fun. I think I played quite well, considering. I know exactly what I need to work on to give him a better match next time. If I could do this well against him, imagine what I can do against everyone else?

Situation #2:

You just got fired from your job.

Perspective #1:

Are you kidding me? What am I supposed to do NOW? I have no money, the job market out there is tough. Will my girlfriend still love me? Life stinks.

Perspective #2:

Hmm, I wasn’t really happy at that job anyway. This might be a blessing in disguise telling me to follow my dreams and do what I love. Wow, maybe I can pursue writing after all. I’m going to email my friend who is a book publisher first thing in the morning and see what my options are. I can’t wait.

So as you’re going through 2008, try to look at things from other perspectives. Other perspectives may be looking at things in a more positive way or from another person’s point of view.

If you’re a business owner, try looking at things from your customers’ point of view.

If you are a student, look at things from your teacher’s point of view.

If you are a son or daughter, try looking at things from your parents’ point of view.

If you are a parent, try looking at things from your child’s point of view.

The point is, there more you see that there are different perspectives out there in every situation, the more likely you will…

Have better relationships
Master your craft/sport
Learn more strategies
Have more fun/engagement
Be more well-rounded

Thanks for reading.

Message #154 Keep Your Commitments

What are your New Year’s Resolution?

Remember to be SMART…make your resolutions:

Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Realistic
Timely

Message #153 Massage #1

I am blogging today in my spa robe, here at the Bedford Springs Resort.

I just finished getting my first ever massage. It was called the Springs Eternal Therapeutic Massage. I liked it. I am supposed to start feeling the effects of it tomorrow. I’ll let you know. The most interesting part so far was prior to my massage, I had to “exfoliate” with this black (walnut and ginger?) scrub in their hydro-shower. It shoots you from all angles. Interesting. Then, I went into the “eucalyptus” steam room to open up my pores. Also very interesting. From there, I was to do three intervals between the warm and cool tubs. Finally, I had to hydrate my skin with (cucumber?) body mist. I then went to relax in the “relaxation” area with some fruit local mineral water and tea. Part of me thinks this spa thing is a bit foo-foo and another part of me feels like a king. I haven’t come up with a conclusion yet.

But I can see how some people swear by spas…there is some magical mind/body/spirit connection that somewhere along the line, we lost touch with. We live such fast-paced lives with ipods, cell phones and the wii that we sometimes forget about nature. We forget about our bodies.

Here are my top 8 reasons to exercise mind/body/spirit in ’08…

1. Increased energy
2. Increased self-esteem
3. Better metal focus
4. Decreased risk of a heart attack
5. Decreased risk of breast cancer
6. Less likelihood of depression
7. Enhances quality of sleep
8. Reduces risk of future illnesses/injuries

There are so many more benefits of exercise. Your body is your greatest asset…how are YOU taking care of it?

Many people focus on…

Money
Fame
Material objects
Status

But none of those things matter if you don’t have good health. I recently heard that you don’t want to be the richest person in the graveyard.

Have a safe and Happy New Year!

Thanks for reading.