MESSAGE #1387 HAPPINESS IN SPORTS AND LIFE
“Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them”
-JACKSON BROWN
Happiness in sports is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them.
Anyone can deal with playing well, but most athletes cannot deal with playing poorly. But most people don’t get it—it’s not about getting rid of problems/challenges, but how we react.
How we make adjustments.
The next time you are in a tough situation, think NOT of the situation, but HOW you are going to react.
Then just do it.
MESSAGE #1385 TWO WORDS
Over the winter, I envisioned the image above in my mind. Last week, I took that image at the Trenton Thunder game of top Yankee prospects, Manny Banuelos and Austin Romine. And tonight, I stopped by the ball park to show it to them. They were impressed with the image and were kind enough to sign it for me.
I spoke with Austin several times last season on baseball and mental toughness (see our video interview HERE), but last night was the first time I spoke to Manny. I asked him if he had anything to say to my blog readers. He said two words:
WORK HARD.
Simple, yet powerful. See, most people want to be successful, but they don’t want to put in the work. People want to be more fit but don’t want to eat healthy. People want to make more sales but they don’t want to make phone calls.
Everybody knows what to do, but nobody does what they know.
How hard are YOU working today?
MESSAGE #1384 BASKETBALL PHENOM TURNED AMPUTEE
Yesterday, I talked about one of my she-roes, my mother.
Today, I want to talk about another one of my she-roes, the great Rayna DuBose (ABOVE at the Sports Legends Museum in Baltimore with yours truly).
For those of you who complain about the little things in life, after reading today’s message, there’s a good chance you will never complain again.
From Rayna’s website:
What started as a dream in 2001 quickly turned into a disaster for Rayna DuBose, a highly recruited student who was granted a full athletic scholarship to play Division I Women’s Basketball at Virginia Tech. Rayna entered Virginia Tech in 2001 as a part of the women’s team which was in the Big East Conference at the time. By the time April 2002 had approached, Rayna was struck with a deadly bacterial disease known as meningococcal meningitis, which then led to 96 days in the UVA Medical Center in Charlottesville, Virginia, with collapsed organs, non-functioning kidneys which had her on dialysis, in a coma, liver problems and worst of all no blood circulation to her hands. She was a vegetable fighting for her life. Soon enough the day came when all four of her limbs were amputated and she became a bi-lateral amputee.
After the pain, therapy and what seemed like torture, Rayna returned back to Virginia Tech in the summer of 2003 to return to her normal college life as if nothing had ever happened. With a year off from school in 2002 she still remained active, taking on-line classes and staying a part of the Virginia Tech Women’s Basketball team by serving as a Student Assistant Coach, still traveling and being a part of the team. In 2003 she received the Most Courageous Award at the Men’s Final Four in New Orleans. In 2005 she received the Wilma Rudolph Award. She was also given the 2009 National Ethnic Coalition Organization Congressional Ellis Island Medal of Honor, and was the 2009 McDonalds Athlete of the Day for the Military Paralympics. Rayna has also made appearances on HBO Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel, CBS Sports, the CBS Early Show, Cayman Islands news, and local news stations. Just recently completed the USA a2 sitting volleyball training camp.
I caught up with my inspirational friend earlier today on Facebook (Yes, she uses Facebook—in fact Rayna and I text all the time).
The first time I met Rayna, I asked her what she did first thing in the morning.
She said, “Put on my arms and legs.”
Anyone feel like complaining about the fact that it’s “Monday”?!?
Today, Rayna told me, you have to appreciate what you have because you never know what can happen. She has actually said that becoming an amputee was the best thing that ever happened to her because now she is helping others.
Wow.
DuBose also said that the secret to life is to love yourself. I like that.
I asked Rayna if she thought anything was possible.
“EVERYTHING is possible depending on how bad you want it and how hard you will work for it.”
That’s mental toughness.
Rayna does not feel that she is handicapped. It just takes her a little longer to do some things. She even drives when she goes out with her friends!
Sports and life is not about what happens to us, it’s all about how we respond.
So the next time you feel like complaining or feel that you can’t do something, remember Rayna’s words.
MESSAGE #1382 A MESSAGE FROM LANCE ARMSTRONG
Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever.
—LANCE ARMSTRONG
MESSAGE #1381 YOUR FUTURE
I want to be remembered as the guy who gave his all whenever he was on the field.
-WALTER PAYTON
What do YOU want to be remembered as?
MESSAGE #1380 YOU CAN DO IT
In 2004, Jan Mela, at age 15, became the youngest person to reach the North Pole. And then eight months later, reached the South Pole. This was a great feat by the Polish explorer, but that is not the amazing part.
Jan Mela did this as a double amputee.
At age 13, Mela was electrocuted in an accident and lost one arm and one leg.
But he did not give up on life.
William Arthur Ward once said, “Adversity causes some men to break, others to break records.”
We don’t choose what happens to us in life, but we certainly choose how we respond.
If Jan Mela can be the youngest person to reach the North and South Poles as a double amputee…
IMAGINE WHAT YOU CAN DO.
MESSAGE #1379 MENTAL BLOCKS
Mental blocks are common in all sports, at all levels. I have seen beginners and professionals get stuck on the six-inch playing field between their ears. Perhaps they are a baseball player, who, all of a sudden can’t throw the ball to first base. Maybe it’s a diver who can’t do a flip.
Physically, nothing is wrong, but mentally they can’t get out of their head…yet.
Slumps happen when an athlete is thinking about the wrong thing at the wrong time.
During competition, an athlete should focus less on the internal (negative thoughts) and focus more on the external (target, form, etc).
The beauty of focusing on the external is that your brain cannot think about your target/form and negative thougths at the same time.
So the next time you have a mental block, accept it and re-focus on the things you can control (your effort, body language and strategy). I think you will be pleased at the results.
And if it doesn’t help right away, stick with it.
Why?
Because if you don’t quit, you can’t fail.
MESSAGE #1376 DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT
Recently, I had a high school athlete as a pretty regular client. But then I had my wedding, honeymoon and schools had spring break, so I did not see this client for a few weeks.
I called them when I returned from my honeymoon assuming we would continue, but no response. I also sent an email, and still no response.
I began thinking things like:
“What if they no longer want to use my services?”
“Perhaps they found another coach.”
“Was it something in my coaching?”
It is normal to have negative thoughts—even the greatest athletes in the world have negative thoughts. But the difference is that the ones who succeed are the ones who accept those negative thoughts, then realize that those thoughts are not productive, and re-focus on the things that WILL help them get to the next level.
So I decided to focus on my current clients and things that are in my control.
Well, I found out that my client was still on spring break and did not have telephone or email access. We are resuming this week.
Care but don’t worry.
Thanks for reading.