MESSAGE #1031 FOUR WORDS…
DON’T QUIT, CAN’T FAIL
DON’T QUIT, CAN’T FAIL
“There’s plenty of room at the top, just no room to sit down.”
Normal people give normal effort.
They do just enough to get by.
But the great ones, the successful ones do a little bit more.
Instead of just selling a product or service, exceed your customer’s expectations. Follow-up, call them on their birthday, or send them a free gift.
If you are a student, don’t just do the reading assignment, read an extra chapter and ask your teacher how you can learn more.
See, most people are playing the wrong game. They just want the sale, or they just want the A.
If you do what the average person does, you will get average results.
If you do what the extraordinary person does, you will get extraordinary results.
Play the game of exceeding expectations and constant learning. It isn’t a harder game, in fact, it’s an easier game because there are fewer competitors. This makes it easier to get to the top.
I recently spent some time with life coach, Dolores DeGiacomo.
I asked Dolores what some common challenges were for her clients. She said that many times people have unrealistic expectations for themselves and others. They focus on external things that are out of their control and then get upset or angry.
When we focus our energy on things we cannot control, we are wasting energy. It’s a losing battle.
Instead, DeGiacomo says, “We should focus on things we can control, like our perspective on situations and people, being kind to ourselves and never give up.”
“How can we do it differently next time?” is better than “What’s wrong with me/them?” DeGiacomo added.
One of her clients was complaining that her mother-in-law was not treating her the way she wanted to be treated.
DeGiacomo asked, “Does she know how you would like to be treated?”
“No,” here client responded.
That’s like if I’m a tennis coach and I expect my students to practice between lessons, work on their fitness, have proper nutrition and work on their mental toughness…but I don’t tell them to, and then get angry at them when they don’t. That’s just silly.
Dolores also recommends that we stay in “learning mode.” When we strive for constant improvement instead of results, we actually start getting better results, as a by-product.
I like that.
For a free 10-minute consultation with Coach Dolores DeGiacomo, email:
A BLACK SWAN is “the existence and occurrence of high-impact, hard-to-predict, and rare events that are beyond the realm of normal expectations.” (Wikipedia)
Roger Banister breaking the four-minute mile was a BLACK SWAN event.
David beating Goliath was a BLACK SWAN event.
Ed Tseng failing out of Rider College twice and then going back to speak (twice) at their Leadership Day was a BLACK SWAN event.
BLACK SWAN events happen all the time in sports and life. The fastest horse doesn’t always win the race. The students with the best grades don’t always become successful.
So why then, do so many people count themselves out before the competition begins?
Why do people think that success is only for the lucky few?
What you believe, you achieve.
Be a BLACK SWAN.
*CONGRATULATIONS TO THE GREAT JOEY CLAWSON, SPECIAL OLYMPICS GOLD MEDALIST, WHO GRADUATES FROM THE COLLEGE OF NEW JERSEY TODAY. WAY TO GO, JOE!*
Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great tennis coach, Javier Perez Cigoj in Argentina.
So yesterday I talked about negative reactions on the court and why they can hurt your performance and results.
Soon after, I received a message from Javier, a tennis coach in Argentina and he said, “Great message, but how should you act instead?”
Well, Javier, the key is to let the point go – you can think about how to make an adjustment, but then, keep it in the past.
1. Take a couple deep breaths (to stay in the present and to lower your heart rate).
2. Project a confident image.
3. Think about where you want to hit your next shot.
4. Focus on the things you can control (your energy, attitude, strategy and effort).
5. Cultivate the feeling of winning the next point (even before the point begins).
The best way to increase your chances of winning is to not focus on winning.
Focus on the process instead of the product and as a by-product you will win more.
IMAGINE THIS…
You are playing a match. The score is 30-30, 5-5 in the final set. Your return is nice and deep which forces your opponent to hit a weak shot. You hit a nice deep approach shot, follow it to net and get a high floating ball to your forehand side. You hit it, it hits the top of the net and you lose the point.
How do you react?
Most players would react negatively with their body language, self-talk or hit their racquet on the ground.
This works to your opponent’s advantage because…
1. You will boost their confidence.
2. By reacting negatively, you actually produce different hormones in your body and create muscle tension (which makes you play poorly).
3. You will decrease your chances of winning the match.
I have worked with some high level players and most of them play unbelievable when they are “on” but when they start losing, their games and body language deteriorate.
This is fairly normal.
Do you want to be normal or do you want to be great?
Act as if it were impossible to fail. -DOROTHEA BRANDE
In this video blog, Ed Tseng interviews former professional tennis player, Neha Uberoi, as they talk about her toughest opponent, mental toughness and Princeton University.
I am currently reading the latest issue of Time magazine, entitled, “The 100 Most Influential People in the World.”
I like to think that I will be in that issue one day; not because I want to say that I have that title, but because I truly want to make as big of a difference in the world that I can.
And you can too.
I know what you’re thinking, “What if I don’t want to be an influential figure? What if I’m happy with what I have?”
Then by all means, continue with what you are doing.
But the wrong mindset is that it is not possible. It is possible.
It won’t happen overnight, but if you figure out the right strategy, put in the work and truly have a passion for it…the sky’s the limit.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a tennis player, musician or accountant; you have unlimited potential.
My friend Bob Ryland, the first black professional tennis player used to coach the Williams sisters, and the first thing I ever asked him was, “Were they more talented than everyone else?”
“No, in fact I didn’t think they were talented at all at first, but they worked harder than anyone else (from 6am-6pm, with breaks of course).”
Yes, talent and physicality help, however, they are not the determining factors.
Remember, ANYBODY can count the number of seeds in an apple; NOBODY can count the number of apples in a seed.
Your potential is unlimited.
Today’s message is especially dedicated to all the players out there who have anger management issues.
I once had a student who would often get angry at himself after losing a point. And by once, I mean, I “often” have students who get angry and negative during competition.
Negativity and anger are common challenges for competitive players, but here’s the good news…
This can be overcome with training (just like fixing your backhand).
What do you say to yourself after you lose a point?
“I can’t believe you missed that shot!”
“You stink!”
“What’s wrong with you?!?”
Let’s analyze this voice for a second…
Does this “inner coach” help you perform better?
Of course not. What if a real coach spoke like this to their player? Wouldn’t you find a new coach?
If this is an issue for you, you need to find a new “inner coach.”
This inner coach should say something like…
“No problem. How can I make an adjustment? Good, now let’s focus on the next point.”
“That point is in the past, let’s focus on the next one.”
“You’re still in control. Let’s go!”
What you say to yourself between points will determine how you play and what kind of results you get.
How do YOU want to play and what kind of results do YOU want to get?
Remember this secret formula: S + A = R (Situation plus Attitude equals Result).
In this video blog, Ed Tseng spends 2.5 days at the Human Performance Institute in Orlando, Florida for a mental toughness certification.