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MESSAGE #1648 ARE YOU RUNNING AWAY?
I have a client and friend I’ll call George. When I met George, he was depressed for many years. During our first conversation, he had an insight and understood how the human experience and mind worked. He realized that he was creating his own suffering for all those years via his own thoughts. His depression has disappeared and hasn’t shown up since. Recently, George and I were talking about how our thoughts create our experience in the moment. I said that you could be on a beautiful island sitting on the beach, but if your thoughts are stressed and filled with concerns back home, your experience will be unpleasant. I also told George that there are people in prison who feel more free than when they were not incarcerated.
George was silent for a moment and said, “That reminds me of when I was depressed…I was in Hawaii, looking out at the ocean, and all of a sudden, anxious thoughts came over me and I was miserable.” He went on to say, “Also, during that time, I moved to Florida, thinking that perhaps moving to paradise would make me feel better. It didn’t. I now know that it was my thoughts that were creating my suffering, not my situation. It was like the Bob Marley song, ‘You’re running away…but you can’t run away from yourself.’ ” I said, “Exactly! It’s like running away from your own shadow.” Thoughts and feelings are directly related.
Our experience of life comes 100% from our own thoughts. Our experience does not come from anything outside of us. It is impossible for you to have a stressful thought and feel happy. It is also impossible for you to have a happy thought and feel stressed. It’s a principle, like gravity: What goes up, must come down. What we think, we feel.
I had never heard the Bob Marley song George was referring to, but “Googled” it. It is now my new favorite song. Below are the lyrics and video on Youtube. Enjoy!
You’re running and you’re running
And you’re running away.
You’re running and you’re running
And you’re running away.
You’re running and you’re running
And you’re running away.
You’re running and you’re running,
But you can’t run away from yourself.
-“Running Away” by Bob Marley
MESSAGE #1644 THINK LIKE THE PROS
My friend used to coach the great Pete Sampras. One day he was training with Pistol Pete, getting him ready for his clay court season…his least favorite surface. Well, my friend proceeded to beat Sampras in three groundstroke games in a row, and as they were getting some water, he thought, “I just beat Pete Sampras three games in a row. He must feel terrible losing to his coach. What could I say to him to make him feel better?”
Before he could think of something to say, Sampras walked up to him and said, “That was GREAT! I really feel like I’m ready for the clay court season!”
Shocked, my friend thought, “What?!? How could he feel great after losing to a coach? That’s not normal.”
In a way, great athletes are not normal.
To me, what set Pete Sampras apart from everyone else was what was going on between his ears…his thoughts. He didn’t lose confidence when he lost. He gained confidence because he focused on the process and looked at his training as preparation, not a blow to his ego. Did he ever have negative thoughts? Of course he did.
We all have negative thoughts.
But Pete Sampras didn’t concern himself with his thoughts. He saw the game differently. Was the game actually different? No, only in his mind.
We all have the free will to look at any situation in any way that we choose. It’s not our situation or circumstances that affect our feelings, it’s our thoughts. 100 percent of the time.
The next time you find yourself in a “negative” situation, see if you can see it differently. See if you can see it like Pete Sampras.
Thanks for reading.
MESSAGE #1642 YOU CAN STILL DO YOUR BEST WHEN YOU FEEL YOUR WORST
Recently I was chatting with a professional baseball player before his game. This player was as physically fit as an athlete could be, but he knew the most important aspect of the game was on the 6-inch field between his ears. I asked him if he ever got nervous during a game and he responded, “I sure do.” I then asked him where he thought those feelings of nervousness came from. He looked at me blankly.
Most people think that feelings of nervousness come from the opposing team, the crowd noise, letting your teammates down, the umpires, etc. Or from an unknown place.
The truth is that nervousness comes from one place and one place only…
Your thoughts.
Every athlete gets nervous.
Every human gets nervous.
The key is not to get rid of the nervousness. The key is to understand where that nervousness comes from, and when you see it as thought, it doesn’t seem so intimidating. When you see it as coming from outside of you, it could be overwhelming.
So how can you do your best when you feel your worst?
Just understand that a feeling is just a feeling and you don’t have to take them so seriously. You can feel nervous and not concern yourself with that feeling and still kick some major butt.
A baseball game (and life) is like a roller coaster–you will have highs and lows. When you realize that the roller coaster is inside your own head, and it is normal, you can enjoy the ride.
Physical skills take a while to develop, but you can be just like the greatest athletes in the world overnight by having the same mindset and attitude as them.
Thanks for reading.
Ed Tseng
Peak Performance Coach
Author of “Game. Set. Life. – Peak Performance for Sports and Life”
Keynote Speaker
609.558.1077
MESSAGE #1641 TOP 5 WAYS TO PLAY IN THE ZONE ALMOST INSTANTLY
In the Yankee Stadium bleachers with Jeff Nelson, a 4-time World Series Champion
I recently spent some time with the former Yankee great, Jeff Nelson at Yankee Stadium. We were at an event for Cystic Fibrosis and participated in the famous roll call with bleacher creature, Bald Vinny, Yankee writer, Jon Lane, and my friend Fred Weiland, among others.
What did I learn from “Nellie”?
1. He was always confident.
2. He was always nervous.
3. He treated both feelings the same way.
Nelson said that he was always confident, but there are so many factors in sports so you never know what’s going to happen. He also said that being nervous is normal. And he didn’t think too much about either one. That leads me to my Top 5 Ways to Play in the Zone Almost Instantly.
1. Understand that feelings (both positive and negative) are random.
2. Understand that feelings (both positive and negative) are neutral.
3. Understand that feelings come and go.
4. Understand that feelings come from your own thoughts.
5. Understand that if you don’t take your thoughts and feelings so seriously, you will play in the zone more consistently.
Notice my Top 5 has no technique, routine or ritual? There’s no how-to. All you need is UNDERSTANDING. The reason why is because when you are in a slump and you look to a technique, it will not work. It will just begin to make you think more. And when you think more, you perform less. The zone is a state of no thought (at least you don’t realize you are thinking), so why would you do the opposite when things are not going your way?
I don’t know either.
Let me end with a quote from another famous Yankee…
“You can’t think and hit at the same time. A full mind is an empty bat.”
—Yogi Berra
MESSAGE #1640 HOPE WEEK
Well, it’s officially HOPE Week, my favorite week of the entire baseball season. The above photograph is of myself and the great Mariano Rivera at HOPE Week 2011. For an entire week, the Yankees honor a person or organization that could use their help. HOPE is an acronym for Helping Others Persevere and Excel. Every season, Yankee players volunteer their time and after helping out, most players agree that they benefitted more than the recipient.
But the Yankees don’t know the secret…yet.
Recently, I taught a class at Whole Food Princeton’s Wellness Club entitled, “The Art of Happiness: Mental Wellness 101.” I told the class that one of the things that makes me happy is to make others happy. The truth is, when I do something nice for someone else, my thoughts and feelings change to ones of compassion, love, and gratitude so it’s not the act, but the thoughts. The same will happen for the Yankees this week.
This week, I also will be donating my time and educating people on how peak performance occurs on the inside (thoughts), not the outside (strategy). Volunteering and helping others is great, but remember it’s your new thoughts that change your feelings, not the kind act itself.
In fact, let’s try a little experiment this week. Wherever you are in the world, I challenge you to do an act of kindness every day this week. I have donated my time with the Special Olympics, Boys and Girls Club of Trenton, Mercer County Juvenile Detention Center, United States Tennis Association, and other great organizations, but this week I’m going to step up my game as well. Your contribution this week could be complimenting a stranger on the street, helping someone with their stroller up the steps, or reading to the blind. As you do these things, see if you notice a change in your thoughts and/or feelings. You may or you may not, depending on your state of mind at the moment. But that’s not the point. Do good things because you want to, not because of how you think they may make you feel.
I will be posting updates this week on this site, as well as on Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter. I would love to hear your random acts of kindness as well. Leave your comments below or on the social media mentioned above.
Thanks for reading.
MESSAGE #1638 HOW TO GET OUT OF YOUR OWN HEAD…
Martina Navratilova is a former World No. 1 female tennis player. In fact, Billie Jean King said Navratilova is the “greatest singles, doubles and mixed doubles player who’s ever lived.”
I played some doubles with Martina when she was getting ready to make her comeback back in 2000. I vividly remember the first time I hit with her. She and I were warming up and I quickly began thinking, “I’m hitting with a living legend…” I was nervous and my strokes and body were extremely tight.
Fortunately, I quickly thought, “She’s just another tennis player. Have fun.” And I did exactly that and played quite well.
Here’s what happened:
1. I was having nervous thoughts which created nervous feelings.
2. My nervous feelings created my tight strokes and behavior.
3. My thoughts changed and quickly my strokes and body became more loose.
Here’s what you should understand:
1. Feelings are not created by external events, e.g., line calls, spectators, comments or Martina Navratilova.
2. Feelings are created 100% by your own thoughts (often without you even realizing that you are thinking).
3. When you are experiencing negative feelings, you don’t have to “do” anything about them. All it takes is the UNDERSTANDING that your thoughts create your feelings (you are the thinker) and if you don’t take them so seriously, your mindset will naturally rise back up.
4. With this understanding, your mind will clear and you will increase your chances of having a peak performance.
Thoughts?
Leave your comments below.
For a free 10-minute phone, Skype or FaceTime consultation on the mental game in sports, academics, business, or life, email: .
Thanks for reading.
MESSAGE #1637 MY NEWEST FACEBOOK FRIEND
One of the traits successful people share is their desire for constant learning. When you have a growth mindset like that, the sky is the limit and anything is possible.
Well, my newest Facebook friend is almost in the sky, she’s 6 foot 11.5 inches tall. Her name is Marvadene “Bubbles” Anderson. I first met Bubbles after her first high school basketball game back in 2009 when she was ONLY 6 foot 10.5 inches tall. A wonderful young lady who has a growth mindset. Enjoy the video of us below and take notice how her goals were to learn as much as she could.
MESSAGE #1636 LIFE IS A MARATHON…
Today is the 116th Boston Marathon. A 26.2 mile physical, mental and spiritual test for over 26,000 runners. And today is going to be a hot one.
Tom Fleming is a marathon runner and he actually was runner-up at in the Boston Marathon two times. When he was at his peak, Fleming would run between 150 and 175 miles a week. An amazing feat in itself. Somebody once asked him, “Do you ever NOT feel like running?”
“EVERY DAY I don’t feel like running…until I start running,” responded Fleming.
Now you may not be a marathon runner, but I can guarantee that at some point today, there will be something you don’t “feel like” doing, whether it’s working out, cleaning the house, practicing or studying. You may not be able to run 175 miles a week like Tom Fleming, but you can certainly have the same attitude as him—-do it whether you feel like it or not.
It’s a choice.
Here’s another great quote by Fleming:
Somewhere in the world someone is training when you are not. When you race him, he will win.
Good luck today to all the marathoners…and good luck to YOU.
Life is not a sprint, it’s a marathon; take it one step at a time.
Thanks for reading.
Ed Tseng
Peak Performance Coach
Pro of the Year USTA 2005
Author of “Game. Set. Life.”
Keynote Speaker
609.558.1077