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Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Brad Abouchedid. Happy Birthday!

Once upon a time there was this woman who was the envy of all her friends. She had two boyfriends, one was named Bill and one was named Charlie. Bill knew of Charlie and Charlie knew of Bill. This went on for about two years.

One Friday night, Bill came over as he normally did on Friday nights to take her to dinner. Bill who was usually late, showed up on time. Bill who was usually mellow, was a bit nervous; and Bill who was normally pretty sloppily dressed, wore a suit. They had a nice dinner and right before dessert, Bill took out a jewelry box and gave it to the woman. It was an engagement ring and Bill asked her to marry him. Well, the woman said the worst possible thing next to a flat out no…”Let me think about it.” So Bill blew up they got into a fight and he never wanted to speak to her again.

The woman went home upset until the next night, when she saw Charlie. Well Charlie who was normally on time was early. Charlie who was normally personable, was really excited; and Charlie who was normally well dressed, wore a tuxedo. So they went to dinner and the same thing happened, right before dessert, Charlie took out a jewelry box and proposed marriage to the woman. And the woman said the worst possible thing next to a flat out no…”Let me think about it.” Charlie also got angry and never wanted to speak to her again.

The woman goes home and lies in bed depressed because she went from two men that were completely in love with her to nobody.

So the only person that could save this woman shows up…her fairy godmother. The fairy godmother saw that the woman was upset asked her what was wrong. “Both Bill and Charlie proposed to me and I don’t know what to do.”

The fairy godmother knew the answer. “Just take two pieces of paper and write the name Bill on the top of one and the name Charlie on the top of the other. Take as long as you like and write the thing you like most about Bill and the thing that you like most about Charlie. Then, your answer will arrive.”

So the woman took the paper that said Bill on top and thought and thought. It took her three hours but finally wrote down what she liked most about Bill. Then she took the paper with Charlie’s name and took another three hours and finally wrote down what she liked most about Charlie. As the fairy godmother predicted, the answer appeared instantly to the woman and she lied in bed as excited as ever.

Her fairy godmother showed up once again and said, “Now you seem like you’re back to your old self. Have you made a decision?”

“Oh yes, I choose Charlie.”

“Well that’s great, what did you write down about Bill?”

“Well when I’m with Bill I feel that he’s the most wonderful person in the whole world.”

The fairy godmother, quite confused replied, “Then why did you choose Charlie?”

“Because when I’m with Charlie, I feel that I’M the most wonderful person in the whole world.”

That’s the whole thing, whether you’re in a relationship, team at work, sports team, sales team or academic team, in order to stand out from everyone else and start making a difference, all you have to do is stop focusing on yourself and start focusing on others.

“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

-Bonnie Jean Wasmund

Thanks for reading.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE’RE ALL LOOKING FOR?

I ask people all the time what they want out of life. Most people don’t know; they don’t know because they’re “too busy” with life. This doesn’t make any sense to me. It’s like saying you don’t have time to get gas because you’re too busy driving.

Then there are those who want a bigger house, a nicer car, the newest iPod or cell phone; others want a new wardrobe or a good job. There’s nothing wrong with wanting nice things but you have to understand WHY you want those things. Most people want those things to feel happy, confident or secure.

Guess what? You can have those feelings right now. You can be happy right now; it’s a choice. THAT’S what we’re all looking for…feelings or a state of mind. If you CAN’T be happy, just smile for one minute. It’s not what’s happening around you or to you, it’s what’s happening INSIDE you. When you have the right mindset, nobody can take that away.

Cultivate gratitude and happiness every morning and you will set the tone for the rest of the day. Here’s how you do it…

As soon as you wake in the morning, write down three things that you are either grateful for and/or that make you happy. When you write those things down, really FEEL how grateful and happy you are; visualize that they are always a part of you. Take deep breaths while you are doing this.

If you get in the habit of doing this exercise every morning, you will increase your chances of having more “good” days versus “bad” days.

Thanks for reading.

Frida Kahlo (July 6, 1907 – July 13, 1954) was a Mexican painter, who has achieved great international popularity. She painted using vibrant colors in a style that was influenced by indigenous cultures of Mexico as well as European influences that include Realism, Symbolism, and Surrealism. Many of her works are self-portraits that symbolically express her own pain. Kahlo was married to and influenced by the Mexican/Spanish muralist Diego Rivera and shared his Communist views. Although she has long been recognized as an important painter, public awareness of her work has become more widespread since the 1970s. Her “Blue” house in Coyoacán, Mexico City is a popular museum, donated by Diego Rivera after his death in 1957.
-Wikipedia

Yesterday I went to see the Frida Kahlo exhibit at the Philadelphia Museum of Art and was blown away. There were beautiful black and white photographs of Kahlo, Rivera and their friends/family along with the powerful paintings of Frida’s. I loved looking at the technique, colors, and surfaces that Kahlo used, along with the symbolism from her own life.

The thing that left the greatest impression on me was the fact that Frida Kahlo hated her life but still was an amazing artist and became a legend. Due to an accident, she was in pain most of her life, oftentimes painting from bed. She had a rocky relationships with Diego Rivera, divorcing and then remarrying him with affairs by both sprinkled in. She had such a distaste for life that during her last days, she wrote in her diary, “I hope the exit is joyful – and I hope never to return – Frida.”

Some of the most successful painters were miserable, some of the greatest musicians went through terrible breakups, and some of the richest people in the world were at one time broke.

There’s something powerful about hitting bottom; it often motivates you to become something great.

So don’t worry about setbacks, they are often a setup for a comeback.

Thanks for reading.