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MESSAGE #231 THE AMAZINGLY SIMPLE SECRET TO GET ANYONE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU…

Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Brad Abouchedid. Happy Birthday!

Once upon a time there was this woman who was the envy of all her friends. She had two boyfriends, one was named Bill and one was named Charlie. Bill knew of Charlie and Charlie knew of Bill. This went on for about two years.

One Friday night, Bill came over as he normally did on Friday nights to take her to dinner. Bill who was usually late, showed up on time. Bill who was usually mellow, was a bit nervous; and Bill who was normally pretty sloppily dressed, wore a suit. They had a nice dinner and right before dessert, Bill took out a jewelry box and gave it to the woman. It was an engagement ring and Bill asked her to marry him. Well, the woman said the worst possible thing next to a flat out no…”Let me think about it.” So Bill blew up they got into a fight and he never wanted to speak to her again.

The woman went home upset until the next night, when she saw Charlie. Well Charlie who was normally on time was early. Charlie who was normally personable, was really excited; and Charlie who was normally well dressed, wore a tuxedo. So they went to dinner and the same thing happened, right before dessert, Charlie took out a jewelry box and proposed marriage to the woman. And the woman said the worst possible thing next to a flat out no…”Let me think about it.” Charlie also got angry and never wanted to speak to her again.

The woman goes home and lies in bed depressed because she went from two men that were completely in love with her to nobody.

So the only person that could save this woman shows up…her fairy godmother. The fairy godmother saw that the woman was upset asked her what was wrong. “Both Bill and Charlie proposed to me and I don’t know what to do.”

The fairy godmother knew the answer. “Just take two pieces of paper and write the name Bill on the top of one and the name Charlie on the top of the other. Take as long as you like and write the thing you like most about Bill and the thing that you like most about Charlie. Then, your answer will arrive.”

So the woman took the paper that said Bill on top and thought and thought. It took her three hours but finally wrote down what she liked most about Bill. Then she took the paper with Charlie’s name and took another three hours and finally wrote down what she liked most about Charlie. As the fairy godmother predicted, the answer appeared instantly to the woman and she lied in bed as excited as ever.

Her fairy godmother showed up once again and said, “Now you seem like you’re back to your old self. Have you made a decision?”

“Oh yes, I choose Charlie.”

“Well that’s great, what did you write down about Bill?”

“Well when I’m with Bill I feel that he’s the most wonderful person in the whole world.”

The fairy godmother, quite confused replied, “Then why did you choose Charlie?”

“Because when I’m with Charlie, I feel that I’M the most wonderful person in the whole world.”

That’s the whole thing, whether you’re in a relationship, team at work, sports team, sales team or academic team, in order to stand out from everyone else and start making a difference, all you have to do is stop focusing on yourself and start focusing on others.

“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

-Bonnie Jean Wasmund

Thanks for reading.

MESSAGE #230 BE YOUR OWN INNER COACH VIDEO AND BLOOPERS

This video is especially dedicated to the great Abi Singaram who just made his middle school tennis team. Great job, I’m not surprised.

MESSAGE #229 PRECISION

NICE SHOT.

MESSAGE #228 THIS IS IT…

Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Jake Myers in Belgium. Mr. Myers made Varsity on his highly competitive International School’s tennis team. Thanks for the voicemail. Congrats, I’m proud of you.

“This is it…I know
’cause it doesn’t feel
complicated.
This is it…I know
’cause when I’m with you I don’t need to be
medicated…”

Oh sorry, I still have The Alice Project’s song in my head from yesterday’s blog. I actually went to see Alice play a solo gig last night in Basking Ridge, NJ and was transformed into another world. It’s amazing to me how a good movie, book, piece of art or music can take you into a magical place. Yes, I requested “This is it.”

I asked Alice what she thought it took to become successful as a singer/songwriter. Here’s what she had to say:

1) Persistence… writing a lot of music (the good and the bad)

2) I’m careful not to second guess myself and go with my instincts

3) Always have paper and pen handy to catch ideas wherever and whenever they come

That is it. Whatever your passion is…be persistent and stick with it. Do a lot of it regardless of whether you think it will be good or not. You might learn something. Use your head and go with your instincts. Whenever you get inspired write it down. Commit to constant learning and improvement.

Checkout www.thealiceproject.com for more on my favorite rock diva…

Thank you to Alice in NY and Jake in Belgium.

Thanks for reading, wherever you are.

MESSAGE #227 BONUS MESSAGE…

Here is a new video by my favorite band, The Alice Project. It’s called “This is It.” I liked it so much I couldn’t wait until tomorrow to post it…enjoy!

MESSAGE #226 YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW

Napoleon Hill once said…

“Sow an action and you reap a habit; Sow a habit and you reap a character; Sow a character and you reap a destiny.”

What kind of life do you want to live?

What kind of destiny do you want to create?

What kind of legacy do you want to leave?

Stop talking and start DOING.

Thanks for reading.

MESSAGE #225 WHAT WE’RE ALL LOOKING FOR…

DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE’RE ALL LOOKING FOR?

I ask people all the time what they want out of life. Most people don’t know; they don’t know because they’re “too busy” with life. This doesn’t make any sense to me. It’s like saying you don’t have time to get gas because you’re too busy driving.

Then there are those who want a bigger house, a nicer car, the newest iPod or cell phone; others want a new wardrobe or a good job. There’s nothing wrong with wanting nice things but you have to understand WHY you want those things. Most people want those things to feel happy, confident or secure.

Guess what? You can have those feelings right now. You can be happy right now; it’s a choice. THAT’S what we’re all looking for…feelings or a state of mind. If you CAN’T be happy, just smile for one minute. It’s not what’s happening around you or to you, it’s what’s happening INSIDE you. When you have the right mindset, nobody can take that away.

Cultivate gratitude and happiness every morning and you will set the tone for the rest of the day. Here’s how you do it…

As soon as you wake in the morning, write down three things that you are either grateful for and/or that make you happy. When you write those things down, really FEEL how grateful and happy you are; visualize that they are always a part of you. Take deep breaths while you are doing this.

If you get in the habit of doing this exercise every morning, you will increase your chances of having more “good” days versus “bad” days.

Thanks for reading.

MESSAGE #224 SACRIFICES

Yesterday I had tickets to go see the long-awaited tennis match between Roger Federer and Pete Sampras at Madison Square Garden in New York City, but I also had a gratitude celebration for a great charity, Stockings With Care at the same time.

I had to choose between a great match and a great cause; between selfish pleasure and selfless contribution.

I chose to help others.

It was a great event; I made the right choice. I spoke with writers and producers that have won many Emmy Awards, talent agents, as well as people who work at homeless shelters in Brooklyn.

When you’re around great people, great things happen.

“You can’t stick you hand in a pot of glue without some of it sticking.”

Thanks for reading.

MESSAGE #223 BECOME THE ARTIST OF YOUR OWN LIFE

Frida Kahlo (July 6, 1907July 13, 1954) was a Mexican painter, who has achieved great international popularity. She painted using vibrant colors in a style that was influenced by indigenous cultures of Mexico as well as European influences that include Realism, Symbolism, and Surrealism. Many of her works are self-portraits that symbolically express her own pain. Kahlo was married to and influenced by the Mexican/Spanish muralist Diego Rivera and shared his Communist views. Although she has long been recognized as an important painter, public awareness of her work has become more widespread since the 1970s. Her “Blue” house in Coyoacán, Mexico City is a popular museum, donated by Diego Rivera after his death in 1957.
-Wikipedia

Yesterday I went to see the Frida Kahlo exhibit at the Philadelphia Museum of Art and was blown away. There were beautiful black and white photographs of Kahlo, Rivera and their friends/family along with the powerful paintings of Frida’s. I loved looking at the technique, colors, and surfaces that Kahlo used, along with the symbolism from her own life.

The thing that left the greatest impression on me was the fact that Frida Kahlo hated her life but still was an amazing artist and became a legend. Due to an accident, she was in pain most of her life, oftentimes painting from bed. She had a rocky relationships with Diego Rivera, divorcing and then remarrying him with affairs by both sprinkled in. She had such a distaste for life that during her last days, she wrote in her diary, “I hope the exit is joyful – and I hope never to return – Frida.”

Some of the most successful painters were miserable, some of the greatest musicians went through terrible breakups, and some of the richest people in the world were at one time broke.

There’s something powerful about hitting bottom; it often motivates you to become something great.

So don’t worry about setbacks, they are often a setup for a comeback.

Thanks for reading.

MESSAGE #222 LEARN FROM THE MARTIAL ARTS

KARATE: “Kata is about correct and proper form; engaging in a real fight is something else.”

TENNIS: “Tennis practice is about correct and proper form; playing in a real match is something else.”

To a certain extent, when practicing an art or skill you need to focus on technique and proper form. But many people worry TOO much on those aspects and wonder why they don’t get the results they want in competition.

Anyone can look good in practice but if you want to get results in competition you need to PRACTICE competitive situations.

Life works the same way. If you want to become a great public speaker, practicing in your living room is good up to a certain extent. In order to gain confidence speaking in front of people you need to…speak in front of people.

So practice good form and technique, but know when to stop preparing so much and start performing. Life doesn’t reward preparation, it rewards action.

“The best way to hit a target is to start firing and make adjustments.”

Thanks for reading.